I admit it: I’m depending on solitude to pull me through the last month of treatment.
Chemo fatigue leaves me breathless and exhausted. I’m less patient, and more snappish. One two hour meeting and I’m toast. I can’t count on my creativity, my imagination, my optimism, my enthusiasms. I’m not so much in touch with the world. I like myself ok this way, but wow.
So I hang out in solitude and take care of myself more. I’m making “dates” with friends for weeks into June, but for May I’m making a noncommital calendar. I’m only planning activities where I can comfortably be a slug.
I haven’t been blogging as much. Getting through the days is the goal right now. I know the writing will come back, for now, it’s spotty.
Medical update: My counts yesterday were low, but ok. No injections needed to get to my fifth and FINAL treatment. It’s scheduled Tuesday May 15.
The chemo drugs will be “out of my system” by the weekend of May 19-20. Leaving me with the accumulated side effects to heal. According to Dr. Gosewehr, I will not be “back to normal” for at least six months. I’ll feel better after six weeks (end of June), my hair will start growing back sometime in July. With short-timer’s attitude, I’m finding this home stretch challenging.
The fourth treatment was much more difficult than the previous three, but Jan was here to take care of me. I’m writing, reading, thinking about blogging, doing Pinterest, posting thank you notes, walking around the block. One good day I planted a window box of flowers.
My preferred past-time is….doing hours of jigsaw puzzles. That’s where you’ll find what’s left of me right now. I love you all so much.